coldly

Posted on November 7, 2014 by jaybeasley2

working tough times
as hard as the looks are
it is even rougher to think
that you are judged by every word
and none of your close family or friends
have read into each idea and what you
do is not noticed by the really real
but that is fine
such is life
I just wanted to show
what was going through my mind
and I cannot hide any longer
like I have done for young years and
old years both
but the closing of the day just shows that I was not allowed
to be myself the whole time anyway
and I can get out under that full moon
but I wont get to see you
until after the feeling has passed
even if
the sun comes out now
it wont save those
who have frozen toes and ass-icles
and for the night
finally my outside matches
how I feel inside my skin
I know that no body showing interest
will be here to warm me
but I am now immune to
the shivers and visual breath
because it is my job to work
and warm others and help others
and get used to having
no one to rely on because the only
fear I have is people seeing
how fearless I am
because when you have nothing
you can do anything…

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untitled

Posted on November 6, 2014 by jaybeasley2

sometimes it comes down
falling on you like a rock
and after so many damn bad decisions
then the wondering begins
wondering why to put out any amount
of words or creative expression
when it hasn’t been the
thing that anyone notices
and to be giving out effort and failing
is as if
I have to admit that trying
is not what I should be doing
and looking for the enhanced
thought to spark another person’s response
is a wrong idea to center on
and sometimes those closest to you
understand more
than most of your real family does
and a few arguments
may be not coming ever again
after the choice of a new found
way do settle the day
from disruption
and to concentrate on
the people who do not criticize any
little thing you say or do
because if you don’t care about yourself
then you shouldn’t have someone else care
about your life either,
right?

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late

Posted on November 5, 2014 by jaybeasley2

partly my fault
partly your fault
I am as
aware as I
have to be
and as excited
as a person can get
the reason is not the important
piece of the puzzle
and a gallon of soap
will be required
after we have seen
this kind of year
there will not be another
way to cross the ocean of
fear
between you and the bottom rung
of the ladder
leading to davey jones locker
across the hall from hades
favorite seafood;
do you recall
the pressing need for
interest in the passions you bore
on your shoulders
when you put effort into making a difference
as if a little old lady
was mentally drooling over a
plate of food that wasn’t hers
but passed real nearby
and was covered with a sauce
made of cheese that stirred memories
or maybe even like a
starving worker who would never
be allowed to eat on the job
but has a whole plate of steak
that is supposed to be thrown away
right in front of
someone so
incredibly desperate…

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kno

Posted on November 4, 2014 by jaybeasley2

ridiculous
you have gone down
and you have been down that path
serious
you don’t even know your own pain
you have been there again
and there are a few pasts
that came out to say hi to you again
but once we were there
you saw your friends
and it wasn’t like it once was
but the moon is out
and your vote is in
and if I knew you once
I will kno you again
but I saw the end
of our only family
who was the connection
between you and me
and there
is not a good cloud in the sky
or a good woman here tonight
and if I could set you free
you would get away from him
and you could be here with
her and me and thee
only one time will I say this again
the crying moon is not your only companion
and please just write me
I will miss you like a sad last date
and the last cup of coffee
and you will know
I am here for you
you are here for me

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write

Posted on November 3, 2014 by jaybeasley2

there is only so far
before the collapse comes in
like a cloud that seemed small
but with enough hail for the whole night
and you have been bitter
but I have seen moods worse that that
and you have been hostile
but there are but only a few good reasons for that
you have a tense feel about you
and there were only so many days to go through
before the end is here
I cannot get enough time
and if I could manufacture more
it would still fall short of the
amount desired
and to try to make things perfect from here would only let you loose my dear
and I have got to get out a few thousand words
before dawn
has it really been so long
between the time we have agreed
and the time we reconnected
but I have to admit
parts of me are okay with that
because I drove myself down
like a car purchased to only get from one place
to the other
then who cares
I could be angry about the personal life
or I could dig up the
many things that upset me
about all my irreconcilable
inconsiderate redefinitions
that made it happen in the first place
instead I move on to putting it down on paper
because the point will be made
either way…

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mood

Posted on October 31, 2014 by jaybeasley2

paced off the steps
from here to there
and saw a few fires still burning
but where were you
and why was it so hard to show up?
I know that the clouds rolled in
and you had to get going
but not before the midnight hour scared you off
so this is the day to
hide away
and the night to come out screaming
or scared
but on this occasion
lets just get a few things straight
once you complete
the drink you have
and held my hand
like last nights plan
there was a bit of blood on my mask
and you had to be host
to the occasional growl
as you could dream
and not think of the work
on your plate tomorrow
because It is away from the cold
and you have a heat near you
and there are fellow friends to make
but I cannot say goodbye to you
so I will be here every time
until this world says
you have had enough

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rhythm

Posted on October 30, 2014 by jaybeasley2

waking the whole room
with the sounds produced
and shaping the evening
to the grip of my hand
on the minds that are here
bold as a marble chair
and the mission I have with you present
flowing out creativity to be manifested
on a drum beat
my hands have multiple cuts on them
and the burns are healing at their own rate
but I have my paint
thrown out across the air
and this is making my painful personal news
easier to get over
because the crush of chemistry and
the flow of my own
inter-extensive individual gravitational pull
is the vivid sound
and the slow drawing out
of a dripping new curse
that each note brings
and I can make my own momentous
advancement of time
motions that mint
each day as fast as possible
because that is how I am

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go

Posted on October 29, 2014 by jaybeasley2

to see this forest
is brings its own scene
making a sound
like ghosts roaming around
and I know you remember back when we
went to the school so close
but now we have to get a new horizon
and the changes since then
are not as scary as the world we live in now
with the scars being given a way
to enter a brand new day
and I wonder if you know
that we both remember things differently than each other
and the growl of a beast
is where I am more comforted at this time
as I have to get a lot done
before the next days dawning
or else the pitchfork will do me in
and I no longer flinch when it stabs me
when you see this last second decision
to join the fight
it is not a last ditch effort to
struggle or flee
it is a sound choice
to pick up the pace for the final leg
of the race I made
to get a delirious joy
in the opening of minds
this time, free…

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begin

Posted on October 28, 2014 by jaybeasley2

in a resisting moment
a calming sound
of the water being poured
before I cannot take any more
I have to go
get up and move around about
because the sunshine coming through
the glass cubes to my left
are reminding me to pursue
the days last rays before cold sets in
and I find myself resisting
the sitting still second
because I have given up on holding back
and now I know I need
the travel of a few miles or two
to assure the feet
that I have a good reason
to work as hard as I do
and now it is really true
nothing is too late
if you give yourself the right tools
you can build a brand new future
so come out from behind those walls
and start a ambition engine
once again

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waiting

Posted on October 27, 2014 by jaybeasley2

wanting
reading
breathing
on the porch hoping for more;
if you were here right now
you better not have any plans
for the next several hours.
just to think of it makes me laugh
and I know that you worried about
something falling from space
just to hit you
but like that show about it
I know you are great at worrying
anxiety like a friend you keep.
but you are a phenomenal one
a fiery beat that is, in turn, shy and fun.
yet a waterfall comes from
the crazy creativity of our joining
a wondrous wild fireplace in winter
our own rainstorm fourth of july
and the sharing of hours we
lose track of;
you don’t see it, but I must
let you know, we are, I think, well about time you observe.
you are the royalty I serve,
my intensity you justly deserve…

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