return

relieved that things are
ever so slightly improving day by day
there were times i wondered how to get here
unbelievable how far you can fall
re-live mistakes or learn and grow forth
needlessly finding the areas that hurt
each day does not have to be a struggle
dare to walk that cliff edge
so that you can feel what others do
implied by the final minutes
that brought this series of thoughts around
unless the fast sadness fades
and takes with it the worries of the year
these hours will enjoy themselves
inspiration is a tool for the brain
on the occasion you have to express something
nearly every day this should be applied

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empathy seeing

made up of tiny portions

of the growls you have been giving

I glance side to side while

hungering for your aggressive claws

pouring out the teeth

and sending them out to get a meal

and I have to ignore the old

pictures of someone else’s

family with wood frames and a layer of dust

but you were there

when the watchful orb came

across your skin and bones

warning was in your eyes

and I saw you look around

as if to find a way to escape again

you cant know how you found me

and I have to bite back

yet I will slow down enough to let

you see the fire on my face

and you know

just as well as I do

there is a succubus

in every church

and in every hellhole

A saint

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dreamy dusty

Buried together
In the wasteland of love
A new plant is growing
Fuelled by the
Light of a single star
Surrounded by
The energy of cold and dark
With bits of light and warm
To remind of a Time
That has not been
Showing its face
To the dawn for many years
But the new age has broken through
Like the part of Alaska
That sees no sun for 63 days
But that first morning
Arrived like a hope
Zeroing in and staying
Like a good warm hug
Or a reason to get up in the morning
And I owe it all to you

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rivers

sometimes you have to be
wondering, where did
that thought come from?
the wishing for today,
the wondering what could be the only
path that leads
you away from so much pain?
the collection of memories are like a river
and we all flow down it
in a simple single set of
beliefs that we are
can cause a tidepool to
control you without
you even being aware of it
and I can’t say I will be
strong like this forever
and I know that I will miss you in the
days that make us apart
but the leaf that dropped
from a family tree
settled nicely on the tiniest
spider web of possibility
until it had come to the convergence of
moments in time and space
that would join all the threads together
and then it dropped
to the spot in that river
and flowed on its way
to the nexus point
and then the rest of the journey
was the same as it was for all of us,
not a choice as much as it was
a lot of options to enjoy
and all in due time…

--
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inside burning

i am the many faces of your mate
nearly making you cry with the saddest stories or
sometimes the song that warms you up
if you need a smile i am your joking jester
dancing for you when you plead for entertainment
enering the kitchen as your private chef each night
buying you the ice cream you want now i know your favorite flavor
unless you need something killed which i would also do
really ready to take you out anywhere fun or just
nest on the couch when you want to just decompress
in case you need a hug i am always near
need a companion for any of your trials, dear?
got me right here

              --
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dismay

do not make a path
in the way of someone else’s future
some of our best choices
may find a way to become our worst mistakes
across the years you have to find out
young and old we all have very similar
lessons to learn from the errors more than trials
eventually you take your wisdom when
another person makes the bad day better
now you see once again
it may be the early bird that gets the worm
nobody warned you that the second mouse
gets the cheese in the trap

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love emergencies

lights that begin to
open up all of my darkness emotionally
very slowly making every
evil desire fade like sinking into the ocean
extracting positive momentum from a
many sided worthless diamond
entering the sorrow that has not been resting
ridiculed so often that i do not recognize it anymore
gifts of rage or alone time are my presents to myself
empty out my mind
neediness is not what i want you to see in me
can i just make sure that
it is the best possible future i am working towards
even asking a close friend for help is like pulling teeth for me
shadows have always been more comfortable than light
hiding someplace is what i got used to
in time i will know what
day is the last test of what i should continue
every minute i am near you i want your love

    ---
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collect

Cradled in the hands of a tree
On the afternoon of a quiet sunset
Long strands of spiderwebs play tag
Little winking flashes of light strobe the glass
Excited inside of the two lanterns of
Cold blue shine and the spiders of Love
That crawl across your skin in a warm draft
In the veins under your hair and the back of your arm
Violet leaves of a flower that is dying
Even as we all must pass, when it is our time
Billowing drapes that reveal the horizon
Roaming around the house with a fever in the blood
Always answering your questions with the sounds of a beast
Incredible purrs slowly unfurling
Now the sky fades darkness

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willpower

when you said what you did
it became clear exactly how you
let the caring overrun everything else
like a wolf who will not share a bone or
playing children who each need thier own toy and crib
only you are the kind who shall
wait as ong as you have to in order to
get what they want or not let someone else get what they want
ribs that cage the rage and
do not deny the diamond blades cutting your insides
empty nest that was never full has a
story to tell if there was any interest yet
there are damaged taste buds to
reveal how off the mark your preferences are
on the occasion that you go that deep into self analysis
yours is the mind only interested in your own
evolution into the type of person you would rather be,
destiny is the clown chasing you

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welcome

as the night
came in to greet me
I shook a past year off
and I stood up and made a toast
to make the day clear
and I have seen a lot today
the seafood was incredible
even though I was far from the ocean
and there was a shadow falling
I had seen a thousand people downtown
in the city that keeps
a full mile underneath of it
I had a great day with a
few drinks in my body
and I have been around for many years
I do not have the words or the way
to thank all my friends and family
for the years of
being there
while I get a few more hours under my belt
and I remember the high school years
fun and trouble and snow and bonding camaraderie
I remember the college years
full of times I think of if I can recall them
and the past ten years
of becoming able and wise or at least better
if not better off
and the talents I have are being used
to make me happy
and the people in my life
I hoped and dreamed to have them in my existence as I got on
in years
and there doesn’t need to be cake or ice cream
for a birthday to fulfill wishes
and the night to be the best one ever
because I can relive, and enjoy
the whole last year
happily,
happily so

                                                             -----
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