depressing bliss

Posted on February 19, 2017 by jaybeasley2
during the night
every emotion came to visit
pulsing through my eyes like i knew it was coming
rising up like a flame of overwhelming anger,
evening arriving like a feather slowly falling,
showing the moon what it brings out of you
sharp as the tongue and mind can proceed to be,
instinct taking control of the steerking wheel, you are
needed by few but needing many,
getting the best out of every little indecision
betting against every bad reaction,
leap up from resting to hurry to where you are at,
in time the beast will be reminded
sometimes to hunt and fight and die
sometimes to curl up in the cave that is home
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devotion destruction

Posted on February 18, 2017 by jaybeasley2

do not remove yourself from your feelings but
enter each one like a place you have
visited when you were in your past
only you can greet them and make friends of them
taking ownership instead of closing them off…
in a box like they don’t exist
occasionally getting let out to see the sunlight
not one day goes by that it is not a good time to feel
don’t ever stay as far away as you can
eventually you must experience
something unpleasant in order to learn from it
there are times when it doesn’t help you
rain coming in cold and stirring up the soft clay
up in the chilly clouds a design is in the movement
creeping over the distance and seeping down
teasing you like memories you thought were gone forever
introducing yourself to how you look to other people
on the one moment you kiss me again
not a single other thing in the world matters

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flames building doors

Posted on February 14, 2017 by jaybeasley2
for long time our paths were separate
left out in the cold of last years yard
amazed that you want me near whenever i see you
maybe i am living in a dream all this time but
eagerly awaiting your complete attention
seems as if it is another quaint shared lunch
bath with a nice cold glass on the edge
under the water it is so quiet
in another world and i dream about your touch
like a mermaid that saved me from drowning myself
don’t ever think it is impossible to change
if you know where you want to be then
now is the time to figure out how to get there
getting over the past often means greeting the future
dare to take the risks
only so many times will these chances be obvious
organized lives are usually far less interesting
rip open the door and escape the fantasy
sometimes your passions fool you worst of all

 

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final sunset of the season

Posted on February 12, 2017 by jaybeasley2
for many a month did
i miss your conversation and even when
nobody was around to hear our jokes
as convenient as this whole
life can seem we still show our claws as
sliding my eyes around the wintery scene
under the disguise of layers does my hungry skin hide
nearly none of the minutes are going by slow
sunshine and stars surf the snowbanks
empty out my pockets and jump into the tub
taking the path of most resistance
only now are my eyes really open to see
found a friend i thought was forever lost
the first words into our minds
had nothing to do with the first words out of our mouths
emotions are the lava rushing down the
side of the rocks
evenually joining up with the calm shelter of ocean
after the clouds swallow up all the light
strong direct lines look up from the
oven which warms to end the hours sweetly
not one more thing to do quickly
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murder negativity

Posted on February 11, 2017 by jaybeasley2
many days have passed since the
under the surface desires come out to play
resolved to make every day the best
day that could be so far
equal parts empty and full inside the glass
reveal that the choice to be made is in the oberver
not too many people are behind you all the way
employ the correct amount of willpower and focus then
get out of your own way when the mountain builds
anger dies when i picture your face
the one minute that you have finally relaxed
it is time to flow and flood and get things done right
vetting eternal arguements from the night
intervene in the swirl of
teamed energies joining forces on the edge of evening
your embrace is beyond inspiring
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happily tortured

Posted on February 10, 2017 by jaybeasley2

 

having never met anyone quite like this before
and arranging to make sure we keep up communication
proceeding with what i want to have accomplished at this age
placing my hands on my arms is the only contact i will have today
it is the travel all based on the imagined destination
lie the migration of a bird that has never been there before
young but still knowledgeable as if
these pieces of information are ingrained down to the bones
out in the wild the air reaffirms direction
roasting the last land seen before shadows descend
time is just a myth of rational existence
used to confuse the far too observant ones
remaining in the realm of critisizing insignificant details
every moment is a grain of sand on the beach
doing lots of nothing with you is a comforting dream
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you are unattentively here

Posted on February 9, 2017 by jaybeasley2
your arms would be awesome
on the occasion that you put them around me
using your lovely mouth to
argue in an ugly way around your thoughts
reliving the fun things that we would be
even better if you spoke about them genuinely
unable to stop joking with you after too late at night
nearly three years and
as we sit here on the couch watching t.v, watching or kissing
terrible as that sounds
there is not one thing in the world i wouldn’t do for you
evening is when we laugh and have seltzer water
nine times out of ten there is a
taste of chocolate or maybe almonds or raisins
in the air is the smell of turkey and miso soup
very silent except for the horror movie blaring off and on
enduring the end of the year
lets me have time for so many strengthening realizations
young is how i feel and i am not dead yet
heavy music pounding thoughts out of my brain
easy as it would be to cease to think
rediculous as we are we enjoy each other
each day is a new adventure
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unusual pictures show

Posted on February 5, 2017 by jaybeasley2
until life shows you what to do
needing to find out the direction of home
under my eyes are the lids closed i didn’t know how tired i am
shining lights shooting down the nearby road
usually the last hours of a day are my favorite
as i move through this year i see new things clearer
love is something all people who feel emotions like me need
please do not forget how much i need you to
introduce a little passion into your life finally
coming outside to join the rest of the tiny world here
tempted by the legs you put before me
unable to control my tongue after all this
red signs all among the turns and
even the moon seems different tonight
sometimes you need some time alone just like i do
so the suffering of little minutes drifts by
how much confidence plays into it is amazing
off in the distance goes the road
when you only stop, to travel, when you find me
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just turn to stone

Posted on February 2, 2017 by jaybeasley2
journeys that can take you far
usually come as less than a surprise
soft curves happen in everybody’s road
turns of a sharper sort can cause a personality shift
taking the road less travelled can do the same
unless you saw that coming a long way off
right this second it seems you are not here
not that here is the best place to be or anything
the ability to leave has been removed from your choices
occassions of restlessness are not usually ended like this
solid and sturdy and sleeping like a rock but
turning from human to a piece of solid earth is
only one way to show where you are at
nobody can escape the things they do to themselves
empty your thoughts and clear your mind
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tasting final goodbye

Posted on January 30, 2017 by jaybeasley2

 

those who see beneath the skin to the energies within know
all of life is lessons disguised as choices
should you ever want to let the universal answers out
take all those things you want to say and crush them
into the darkest corner of yourself for when you
need to be as vicious and aware of the weakness that
gets into the air if you show your growl to anyone out there
fear is only for those who cannot get over
intense things that have happened in life
none of my emotions will see the outside world until morning
attempting to change you is not going to happen
let the atmosphere grab on as I let go of
grinding down all the hope I have shown
only the future can see where it is leading me
on the horizon I realize hate is as common as
  dirty air and kindness is as uncommon as not bothered trees and of course
you know that the increase of the second will decrease the first,
every beautiful natural soul knows that

 

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