guarded

I am not…
I sat on the chair
Resting on wood and breathing the breeze
And observed a canine
For many hours
Missing the one whom he is most dedicated to
Whimper at the sounds of a house and
Barking anxiety at each car or person
Who comes close enough to
Pull the idea of being the one
Very most important person out
But never receiving it for
Many many many
Hours on end
And being devoted
And staring at the door
And hoping and wanting
To no avail
But my energies sympathetic and
My emotions understand but
I was there once for her
But now i am not

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willing

When the world tells you
To not remember
Who you are, listen to that inner
Voice that says
“do not stop. Just be who you are.
Grab every chance and
Let your love of life
Propel you to your path.
If you listen, your
Energy will guide you to your own
Personal greatness. That is you”

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crush adorations

can you tell me that
really all questions are the same
until you know where you
should have said something different
have you not been as
aware as you know you could’ve or should’ve been
don’t doubt your
overly assumptive bizarre instincts
right now you are the most charming smile
and i do not want to let you see me like this
taking time to breathe before i speak this time
i am not able to allow myself to be controlled anymore
on the table is my only motivation
nearly holy music that sets my teeth on edge
some of the most catchable thoughts hide there
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love tribe request

like the time we had a good long drive
on the day it rained
venting after a few final moments outside
even as we are dancing and slow kissing
take the moment to
realize where it is you have been
if i could just hold your hand again
but if i was you and here i would be
ever so gratefull
roasting in the heat of the blazing day
entry to these places we enjoy
questions that showed but weren’t brand new
unless you saw it from outside you cannot know
easy to give away like the spectacular delicious
shots i paid for that you showed up for
this isn’t your first spontaneous disappearance
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complete misdirection

can you look outside and see
over the counter, next to the chair,
many days have passed since the table was
placed there and we both peacefully sat,
like the hours rolling by were of no concern,
eventually the sun will go to bed and
then i am quite sure that you will make me remember
efforts that you put in, which
maybe i did not endure just as much, but
it makes us feel better to have a few
slightly unhurried hours each sunset time;
dine out in the sunshine like it or not
including the month each five o’clock may
readily get along
equal parts calm complacency or whimsical cheeriness
coming to frighten away demonic existentialism
that these modern times cause anxiety about
introduce yourself to a brand new way
of always seeing the delivered side of
nearly perfect packages of introspection
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passage

The

world

is

filled

with

people

who

have

bodies

that

are

awake

and

whose

souls

are

asleep

and

love

and

inspiration

slow

dance

between.

Only

the

insightful

hear

the

music

of

the

hidden

Devine.

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processing today

perhaps you didn’t know we were both from here
roam as if there was nothing set in stone
opening eyes as every minute races by
coming back from an extra fast daytime
eager to get comfortable and
sun joining up with the cloudy horizon
slowly going to sleep in an orange blanket
if a thought occurs to you that is too negative
not a moment of hesitation, just crush that idea and
get back out in that workout room of your soul’s light then
take a long drink from an ice cold dream
occasionally the plants do thier breeze mambo
don’t even mind the date or the time
after all, we are choosing to not even use our playoff tickets
you and i both know that we would rather slow dance here
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humble compromise

having the perfect plan for the evening in hand
under the water where hot bubbles come
making your back relax and hopping in your lungs
below the surface of the water is heat building
letting these steamy moments rise up and float
either soup or salad or both can help
complete the thought for today
only you can make me excited to be upright and breathing
making a choice to be here for you when you need
perhaps you know how i race home to you after work
ready and willing to do anything you desire
on the occasion of this year and our
many year anniversary that snuck up on us
if i could i would give you flowers every day
sometimes even blackberry brandy and chocolate
ending the day next to you is a wish come true
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search thyself

so many times i pictured your face
each day as i begin to paint
and now i have become fortunate enough that you
reach out an let me touch you and
caress your amazing face in slow endearment
happiness is not a strong enough word to say what shines in my eyes
then there are the times when i need to know you
have to see how much i really care for you
your tenderness here in my arms is the most perfect feeling
sometimes i even dream about it but
ease myself back to reality and this bed we share
like a leaf slowly resting on points of grass
flooding my energies with gratefullness and thankfullness
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find new experiences

flying to the places you remember
inside your mind it all seems so real
none of these kinds of days are rooted in place
deny myself the basic needs of
nice embraces and a warm comfy blanket
even if it is the day to go outside and explore around
while the world keeps going through the hours
eventually the end of our story is here like
x,y,z, and then the song is over
predicting where the future will lead is not for me
eventually i am just going to pick my own direction and
ride that sunset all the way to a different spot
if it was my last day i would face it with a smile
end of every day just learning to be thankfull
now i know to pay attention to how open and giving i am
could be i need somebody to remove all emotions from me
endure the loss of every passion and devotion
sometimes you just got to break free

e

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