recover infinite joy

Posted on May 29, 2016 by jaybeasley2
reading into every comment doesn’t help
ending the day thinking too much doesn’t either
capturing moments in the words that bite
opening my mouth is now something i avoid
very deep in the calm that is my soul’s pool
emotions have become strangers in the house
riding the waves of socialization and sound
if i was the last one to leave i would miss you
none of the past three years do i regret
for now i avoid the pain i once enjoyed
intense analysis of
nights of insanity and days of desire
i have played hide and seek with
thousands of moonbeams and stars this year
enter the evening with a
joyous song in your soul
only the open air and
you can bring me home this time
Posted in peace, poem, poems, poetry, Uncategorized | 1 Comment

completed destination

Posted on May 28, 2016 by jaybeasley2
complicated times cause people to be
orderly in the way they beat each other down
minutes can pass slowly when you cannot
please your brain any direction this day
like the hundred times you doubt
every time a whole day goes wrong
there are only statements to show yourself
each bit of time when
dispair will be shown that it will not win
drowning in rain is easier than this
eyes seem to reveal far too much these moments
sometimes i just want to hear someone say they care
the best i can get is to hope i am not abused
in time i will build up bigger walls
not that this comes as a suprise of any kind
ache of an emotional sort like a pocket watch i carry
there are ways to relieve my wearyness
into the living room under a warm blanket
on this plate a warm pumpkin brownie
now i just need your embrace to be completely recharged
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nineteen months ago

Posted on May 27, 2016 by jaybeasley2
notice the little changes and
issue yourself permission to move on
now is the soonest you can make a change here
everytime is how much you know i love every day
thier life is not like ours in that way
end any reason you have to feel fear
equal to alone time should be time time out being social
not one hour goes by that i don’t think of you
mountains or sea i really want you here with me
offering myself to you as often as you let it happen
naming the fun things we have done together
this pain you feel must be healed
have my life in exchange for your renewal
sacrifices will, of course, have to be made
after all, we live for the moment
gifts of time are the best ones there are
only you can make yourself live without regret
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endurance elements

Posted on May 21, 2016 by jaybeasley2
equal parts gratitude and regret
night is coming in like a dark storm
deeper into the mountains and stars we will
use the fire in our soul to carry on
roaming under the blanket of branches
allowed to be molded by the depth of silence
needles from pine trees fall in the breeze
collecting a walking stick and a few giant leaves
elms that almost have faces in the bark
ending the river walk by picking up a rock to keep
love is a forest that welcomes you in
eventually the air lightens a person up
maybe you see the magic if you know how to look
every leaf is a hand waiting to be read
nineteen months seems like forever now
taking time to appreciate the way life can be
sharks start to die if they sit still too long
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time comprehension

Posted on May 21, 2016 by jaybeasley2
touring the past where i once lived
in these last days we all will learn again
maybe realize things from so long ago
even if the future is as seeable as a picture in a frame
complete with the soundtrack that is appropriate
only you can see where i am coming from
my fierce hard headed fiesty mean
princess who has flowers in her hand
right next to you is the dog who knows your mind
eventually i will learn the truth about you
hearts like yours can only be icy for so long
end the holdout and wash in the warmth
now is the time because it goes by so fast
sometimes in the future i can see you loving me
inordinate pauses can cause hesitaion
only letting the fear win can hurt this much
nobody should effect us this way
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little destructions

Posted on May 19, 2016 by jaybeasley2
love has been burning a hole in me
in the way that a house can be wrecked by
tragedy like a fire or a murder
tested in a race that is unexpected or
little tortures that break your spirit slow
end up showing more of yourself than you know
do what you feel the finish line should consist of
even if it means jogging through the flames today
shifting from the future to the present is a
taste of the work required to move on
riddles you placed for yourself far in the past
under the hypnosis of a delusional confidence
coming in above the radar
these tomorrow tempest-filled times tickled
included in the dodging of
only a few hundred bullets of meanness
nowadays heroes are made by dealing with thier life
so don’t judge when a struggle is in front of you
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stabbing ghosts again

Posted on May 17, 2016 by jaybeasley2
starting off ready to make a choice
taking a moment to clarify and verify
as i slowly lose my mind once more
below the window are my favorite shoes
beside the shirt i was tortured and suffered for
in every moment i held on to last until
not one more day could i stand it
get my life all back together again
got my fire and treasure every day
having no more excuses to avoid progressing
often i used to dream about a life like this
showing my true self more and more and more
then i can’t cover up the windows anymore
some of my favorite books were given away
after this year nothing is guaranteed
getting older never really slowed me down
across the years and across the miles i learned much
inside this sphere of yours the world isn’t so clear
nobody gets it all unless they are willing to give it all
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inspiation owned

Posted on May 15, 2016 by jaybeasley2
if i didn’t hear from you today
no thing or person but you can comfort me
sitting here full of worry and
pretending like everything is okay
in a way that should reveal lots of nothing
right now i cannot think of anything but you
after last night i know your heart hurts too
these curses to your health are painfull and i know
in your pain and heart there is no relief
opening your eyes to look at me makes me see
needing to find a way to get you away from the ache
offering you every bit of what i have to give
while you go through tests i work even harder
names if medical details and terms are questioned
emotions can crash down and burn the spirit
do believe that you are strong enough to get through
Posted in poems, poetry, poetrybook, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

suprising impressive

Posted on May 14, 2016 by jaybeasley2
starry nights filled with
unusually radical flavor which can
pursue the strolling individual indoors or
ramming the rest of the quiet into your brain
isn’t the most unusual thing that happened this week
strings in an orchestra rise up when you come in
including me in your life was a big a compliment as ever
normally it takes forever to warm up to someone
getting through bad times to arrive here was worth it
it seems like i knew you lots longer than i did
maybe you even felt the same way
parting the clouds to
reverse the aging process for just now
expect nothing and demand nothing
sometimes life is only here to suprise you
still making you
interesting dinners and repeated new gifts
violet flowers and almond filled chocolates
every time i wake up, i step outside
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protection of property

Posted on May 14, 2016 by jaybeasley2
placing my hand on my head
reaching into the thoughts that assault me
organizing how to fight that plague
these times are made to test your nerves
empty treats don’t live around here anymore
carry me off to the horizon, i ask the wind
trading the stillness for persistant movement
if you want me here then let me know
offer up a sip from today’s golden cup
now that you know how much poison is in it
only you can cause my earthquake to stop
focussed on the current year and not the past
probably always had a good reason
right on time and still a few years late
only you can bring me back to glad acceptance
peering out at the existence we once knew
every curve in the road is just a challenge
ready and waiting to be overtaken
tempest filled times that do not quit
you make nervous storms an enjoyable rocking ship
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